Summer Transfer Market

In football summer time is the busy period for a lot of clubs to buy players and get rid of players, you read the newspapers and newsnow to figure out which club being linked to which player. In real life we use facebook and twitter to figure out who is hooking up with whom and who is available.

You know It’s summer time when the skirts and dresses are getting  shorter, relationships  are coming to an abrupt end, you are  seeing more people in your local gym and of course everybody going on holiday. The summer holiday is kind of like one big long scouting trip, people expect you to stare, so stare as much as you want. Use bribes (buy drinks) lies (pretend you play in the Champions League instead of league 1) and tricks (catch her offside) while on this scouting trip. Nobody knows what your job is (which club your from) or how much money you have (go from basic salary to top earner) or how many shags you've had (go from a dry spell to prolific scorer). Do your research because a scouting trip without any signings is a wasted scouting trip!

Here are our five hot tips to help with your summer acquisitions...

1) The Gamble - 

Uncover a diamond in the rough - there's always that one player who nobody's seen before, none of the big guns have looked at them, and they're available, and often open to offers. In real life, she's young, she's inexperienced, but she's eager. You be the experience, you show the faith, and you offer her that first professional contract!

2) Summer Budget - Keep your budget open until the end of the window - don't blow your whole kitty at the start of the window, keep some funds back. This applies to those summer pulling holidays, weigh up the options then at the last possible minute make your decision. Nothing like committing to a signing early doors then seeing someone else scoop the top prize. Patience is a virtue, and a patient man is a wise man but don’t become too patient i.e. Arsene Wenger/

3) The Trial - Offer her a trial. Many clubs use trials as a way of testing out potential signings. Don't give out your number, don't commit to anything, keep things casual. At the end of the holiday if you want to extend the deal then you can. 

4) The loan Deal - The same applies to loan signings, sometimes boyfriends let girls go on holiday, the same way clubs let players out on loan. If you loan a girl, make sure you honor the agreement and release your interest at the end of the period, remember it was only a fling.

5) Older players- All else fails you can acquire an older women you know what we are talking about the older women who go on vacations with their friends looking to feel young again. Easy acquisition because they are experience and willing to be admire about younger men.

Enjoy the summer before the winter transfer market kicks up!!

http://youtu.be/Kr0tTbTbmVA

Dating is like playing football manager

Since my conversation with my cousins friend about dating is like playing football manager. Before you start laughing or questioning the theory think about it for a second. You talk to a lot of women that you’re trying to either date or sleep with them. What is the main thing you do in football manager? Buy players! You got your transfer kitty and you try to negotiate a transfer for a player for your team. Every guy knows that you shouldn't put all your eggs in one basket. You need to have a squad, most football teams have their starting 11 and the bench, reserves, and you got your youth team (girls who are 4+ years younger than you) females are unpredictable the more you have on your team the better of succeeding and not getting pulled in.

So this is how it works basically we use this theory to talk in cryptic language when we were around people so that our business wouldn’t be all out in the open.

Transfers/Youth/Reserve:

Transfers

Football term - Transfer you know how it works... A team negotiates to get a player on to their team.

Dating world - When you’re dating a chick you’re in negotiation to get with her, a successful transfer is when you get her.

Unlike football the transfer market is open 365 days 24hrs 7 days a week a transfer could be completed anytime. But be careful there are other clubs out there who are competing for the same players and will tap up players with no regards there is no honour in this game we play.

Transfer Kitty

Football term - transfer kitty is the amount of money a team can use to buy players

Dating world - Your job is your income for your transfer kitty after you take out your taxes and bills whatever you have left is your transfer kitty. Obviously the higher your budget the more girls you can negotiate with and vice versa, I mean you wouldn’t see Huddersfield Town negotiating a deal with Barcelona for Messi would you?! But always remember whatever your budget is Spend Wisely!! Don’t want to do a Leeds do you??

Youth Team

Football terms - Football teams have young players to groom for the future

Dating world - There’s two scenarios A. Sugar daddy who has money and will just buy any women to make wifey one day. Sugar Daddy’s of the world we call them Roberto Mancini. Regular Joes are those who prefer to go with youth because they are ‘inexperienced’, cheap and keen to perform on the big stage we call the regular Joe an Arsene Wenger of the world.

Reserve

Football terms - Players who are not ready yet to play in the first team or recovering from injury to get back into the first team

Dating world - Women who just gotten out of a relationship and are not ready to jump into another one.  Also you have women in your reserve side just for the intention of hooking up and nothing more.  A girl can be dropped into your reserves if another ‘better’ girl becomes available to negotiate with. However it is important to remember not to neglect your reserves otherwise they will become unhappy and move on.
Acelucky