In football summer time is the busy period for a lot of clubs to buy players and get rid of players, you read the newspapers and newsnow to figure out which club being linked to which player. In real life we use facebook and twitter to figure out who is hooking up with whom and who is available.
You know It’s summer time when the skirts and dresses are getting shorter, relationships are coming to an abrupt end, you are seeing more people in your local gym and of course everybody going on holiday. The summer holiday is kind of like one big long scouting trip, people expect you to stare, so stare as much as you want. Use bribes (buy drinks) lies (pretend you play in the Champions League instead of league 1) and tricks (catch her offside) while on this scouting trip. Nobody knows what your job is (which club your from) or how much money you have (go from basic salary to top earner) or how many shags you've had (go from a dry spell to prolific scorer). Do your research because a scouting trip without any signings is a wasted scouting trip!
Here are our five hot tips to help with your summer acquisitions...
1) The Gamble -
Uncover a diamond in the rough - there's always that one player who nobody's seen before, none of the big guns have looked at them, and they're available, and often open to offers. In real life, she's young, she's inexperienced, but she's eager. You be the experience, you show the faith, and you offer her that first professional contract!
2) Summer Budget - Keep your budget open until the end of the window - don't blow your whole kitty at the start of the window, keep some funds back. This applies to those summer pulling holidays, weigh up the options then at the last possible minute make your decision. Nothing like committing to a signing early doors then seeing someone else scoop the top prize. Patience is a virtue, and a patient man is a wise man but don’t become too patient i.e. Arsene Wenger/
3) The Trial - Offer her a trial. Many clubs use trials as a way of testing out potential signings. Don't give out your number, don't commit to anything, keep things casual. At the end of the holiday if you want to extend the deal then you can.
4) The loan Deal - The same applies to loan signings, sometimes boyfriends let girls go on holiday, the same way clubs let players out on loan. If you loan a girl, make sure you honor the agreement and release your interest at the end of the period, remember it was only a fling.
5) Older players- All else fails you can acquire an older women you know what we are talking about the older women who go on vacations with their friends looking to feel young again. Easy acquisition because they are experience and willing to be admire about younger men.
Enjoy the summer before the winter transfer market kicks up!!
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